Second Guessing is Just Annoying

During my whole time in college, I had believed that all the experience I was getting from practicing at a TV studio and working on media activities were going to give me a tremendous boost when it came to trying to find a job. I'm not saying it was for nothing, because it wasn't. However, after applying to one channel already and getting shot down, I'm wondering what else do I need to do in order to get a break pulling cables at a channel.

Today, I saw another part-time at another station and for a moment, I actually doubted myself a bit. I don't know why, since my previous experience really taught me a lot and it's all stayed with me. So that can't be it. The job did seem a bit out of my reach, especially since the job description included complete knowledge of teleprompters. The only time I got to use one was during a brief moment, and it was just to test the system.

"Want to use the teleprompter so we can check the system is fine?"

*claps like a monkey* "Yay Teleprompter! Watch the words fly!"

Well...it wasn't quite like that, but you get my point. It was very brief. However, the rest of the job description covered stuff I had previously done or know how to do, all thanks to my experience as a production assistant. Yet, I was worried. Here I am, with this knowledge and a particular set of skills. Skills that I have acquired over a long period of time...wait, I almost had a Liam Neeson moment there. But the principle is the same. I have skills I would like to put to the test, but I fear the stations might not give me a chance.

Even if I end up working elsewhere, I will somehow find a way to follow my dream to be on a TV production crew. Heck, I can even volunteer at a smaller station and gain experience until I'm good enough. The point is, don't second guess yourself. The second you do, you end up going on a crazy spiral for a day like me. Trust me, I wanted to punch myself in the face for worrying so much. But I couldn't do it, especially since I would know it's coming.

I can't wait until I start my master's degree, because I know it's gonna give me a fighting chance. And not just that, but then I can teach when I'm done. Now that I think about it, I'm gonna be one strange teacher...